I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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