So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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