if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
