im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
