Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
