Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
