...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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