she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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