hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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