I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
