So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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