that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
