If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
