I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
