these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
