Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize