She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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