How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
