Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He better not be in your backpack
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
