i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
