why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
