you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
The adults are the big ones right?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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