what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
