Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
