That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
