Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
