My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
