This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
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I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
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Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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