we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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