so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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