I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
