The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
