Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
