He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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