Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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