I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
