SEEEEXXX PLEASE
please come you make the beer taste better
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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