well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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