Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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