life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
