Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
