yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
