Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
