garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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