If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
