Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
