well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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