she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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