I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize