it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize